It has been brutal weather these past few weeks in NYC. A lot of us firefighters are being over worked due to the city's low budget. So even though we were running around all day and night for 24 hours I managed to squeeze in a meditation session while we sat at a manhole fire for 3 hours.
I was in my bunker gear sitting in the fire truck, wet and cold. It was quiet so I decided to try and meditate on the breath. I sat comfortably with my back straight and started to focus on m breath. Inhale, exhale, repeat =)
I would be good for a little while then I would start to think of Sharon talking about letting things go when thoughts came into the mind. Then I noticed that I was thinking about Sharon telling us how to meditate and what to do during it. BUT then I realize I was not letting go, but going with the thoughts of what Sharon has said in the past. So, I started over again. Inhale, exhale.... All is well now. But now I start to think about how Dharma Mittra taught me how to meditate... I noticed that and then came back to the breath.... I started to use numbers to focus on.. Inhale ,exhale 1. Inhale, exhale 2... I started to think that makes it easier. I have attachment to numbers, then I started to remember how Ma Jaya taught me how to meditate using numbers and how they keep you focused..... From there I noticed myself playing back her words of wisdom and then I stopped myself and started all over again...
At this point I start to laugh. I say to myself "What an ass kisser I am". I am trying to thank all the people that have helped me learn about meditation and show them that all their teachings have helped me become a good meditator. When in fact I should be MEDITATING, lol... I guess I had to start my first day like this to show the people that have helped me along this journey the love and appreciation I have for them and their teachings. Next time I can just focus on the breath and my own monkey mind ;)
Thank you Sharon, xoxoxo