I must have started and stopped writing this post ten times this morning. I awoke scattered and tense and when I sat, I felt so restless. This is not generally a problem I have first thing in the morning. I’ve re-dedicated myself to getting healthier and making meditation a daily practice has become my foundation for that path. And by healthier, that generally means lighter. My weight has been an issue most of my life. As I write this, I am stunned by how profound that really is because most of my life means over forty years. Now, I’m very clear that I can take away from this that I’ve wasted a lot of energy worrying, thinking, planning and scheming to somehow change the fact that I’m never going to have the body of a model or I can simply accept who I am and where this body is right now. I’ve never written about my struggle with weight because I’ve always convinced myself that if I don’t acknowledge it publicly, it will change – that I will miraculously shed the pounds with nary a thought. But for me now, it’s really about health. I’ve long given up the desire to look good in a bikini. And I’m guessing I don’t need to broach the subject of body image and young girls. Just when I think our culture is starting to ‘get it,’ invariably I see something in the media that sets us all back fifty years.
For me, meditation is about letting go. Literally, letting my brain rest and giving in to that settled feeling that comes with acceptance. As such, my meditation practice gives me something more than any diet guru can provide. It gives me weightlessness.
Now that’s a diet I can stick to.